Keeping Your Ego In-Check – Like a Hypnotist

Our opinions often feel like an extension of who we are. When someone challenges them, it can feel like a personal attack, triggering defensiveness or even anger. But what if we could detach our ego from our opinions? Doing so not only allows us to see things more clearly but also fosters personal growth and better understanding.

Here’s why keeping your ego in check is a game-changer:

1. Egos Cloud Judgment

When your ego is tied to your opinions, your focus shifts from finding truth to protecting your pride. This makes it harder to see facts objectively, limiting your ability to learn and adapt. By detaching your ego, you open yourself up to new perspectives without feeling threatened.

Example:

Let’s say you’re discussing an upcoming election with someone who supports the candidate you oppose. If your ego is involved, you will likely dismiss their viewpoint to protect your sense of “rightness.” This leads to division and often hostility. There is no curiosity in the questions, only attempts to catch the other in the wrong answer. Without ego, you can evaluate their ideas on merit, leading to a more productive and enlightening discussion. The whole conversation becomes enjoyable and enlightening.

2. Detachment Encourages Growth

Letting go of ego allows you to view feedback as an opportunity rather than an attack. When you aren’t clinging to being “right,” you’re more willing to reassess your opinions, correct mistakes, and evolve your thinking.

Tip:

The next time someone offers criticism, pause and ask yourself: Is there truth in this feedback? How can I use it to grow?

When I let my ego drive, even little things (like my kids challenging me on something I said) create big spikes in negative energy. When I take my ego out of it, I am able to see things more clearly and my energy and behavior follows suit.

3. Clearer Decision-Making

Ego-driven decisions are often reactive and emotionally charged. Detachment enables you to respond calmly, weighing the pros and cons without bias. This leads to choices rooted in wisdom rather than impulse.

Practical Application:

In disagreements, focus on the problem, not the person. This shifts your mindset from winning the argument to finding the best solution.

4. Enhances Relationships

When ego dominates, it creates walls between people. Reining it in fosters empathy and understanding, improving communication and reducing conflict. Relationships thrive when both parties feel heard and respected.

My wife and I have an agreement where if one of us is feeling too clouded by our ego-state, we express that we’re not ready to hear the other person out just yet and make a plan to revisit the conversation. More often than not, though, we just take a pause and a deep breath and then we’re ready to hear the other one out.  It has been an absolute game-changer in our communication and our relationship.

5. Promotes Inner Peace

Defending your ego is exhausting. Letting go frees you from the need to prove yourself, leading to mental clarity and emotional calm. You become more resilient and less reactive to external triggers.

What would that kind of stability bring to your life?

How to Detach Your Ego

1. Practice Self-Awareness: Notice when your emotions escalate during disagreements and mentally call them out for what they are. Simply acknowledging negative feelings by name can cause them to retreat.

2. Ask Better Questions: Instead of asserting your opinion, seek to understand others’ perspectives. Treat the other person as though you have something to learn from them. When you approach with curiosity, your energy is different than when you approach with your ego in the driver’s seat.

3. Embrace Humility: Remind yourself that everyone has something to teach you. Even if you’re a hypnotist with 19 years of experience, even the newest hypnotist can teach you something you didn’t know. Embrace that!

4. Meditate or Reflect: Spend time contemplating the difference between who you are and what you believe.

Detaching your ego isn’t about abandoning your values—it’s about aligning with truth and growth. When you take your ego out of the equation, the world becomes clearer, richer, and more full of possibilities.

Start today. Pause. Reflect. Detach. And see how your relationships, decisions, and peace of mind transform.